The Power of Changing Your Mind Chatter to Speak Up with Confidence
I had an interesting experience on a night out last night.
I ordered a cocktail that I later realised had an incorrect ingredient in it. I had drunk most of it but didn’t enjoy it... and then I figured out why — someone had mistakenly put apple juice into the container meant for coconut/lime/mint juice, and that’s what ended up in my cocktail.
In my mind, I was clear — I had ordered and paid for a specific cocktail. The ingredients were wrong, and it was the bartender’s responsibility to fix it.
Sounds simple, doesn’t it? And yet... why is it that the simplest things, like sending an order back, can feel so hard to do?
I really understand why now.
There was a time when I would have felt embarrassed to go up and ask for something to be corrected. I distinctly remember being at a restaurant in Melbourne where the wine tasted like it had gone off — and in fact, it had. But my thoughts were, “I don’t want to be a nuisance”, “It’s ok — I’ll just drink it, that’ll be easier and safer than saying anything and embarrassing myself”, “What will the waiter think of me if I ask for a replacement?”, “Why would they do that for me?”
And so I sat there and forced myself to drink it... not speaking up for myself.
Fortunately, someone else at the table did, and the wine was replaced. But that internal experience? It was exhausting and disempowering.
So what does your mind make out of any given situation?
And how close is that mental story to the actual reality?
For me, back then, my mind chatter took me further and further away from what was real.
But last night was different.
There was a different kind of mind chatter — the kind I’d deliberately installed over the years through coaching and practice. And now? It’s an unconscious habit. It sounded like:
"What’s the reality of what’s happened here?"
"What’s within my power to do to rectify the situation?"
"Whatever the outcome, I’m OK to ask."
So off I went to the bar.
Are you aware of your mind chatter?
Does it take you away from the truth of a situation?
And perhaps most importantly — are the results of your inner dialogue empowering or disempowering?
Choose EMPOWERING.
You deserve to be heard — in small moments like sending back a cocktail, and in the bigger moments of your life and parenting journey. If you’re ready to transform your inner dialogue and show up more confidently for yourself and your family, I can help. Let’s connect and start that shift together.