Adolescence, Technology and the Power of Connection

It’s the drama series on Netflix that everyone’s talking about.

If you’ve been watching Adolescence, you’ll know... it’s an eye-opener. The themes are confronting, the storyline raw, and what it brings up about growing up today is hard to ignore.

The biggest shift for parents raising this generation?

Technology.

It has changed everything... from how we communicate and connect, to how we shop, learn, play and socialise. Our children are growing up in a world that never switches off, and the reality is... we can’t keep them away from it entirely.

So the question isn’t, “How do I block it all out?”

The real question is, “How do I help my child build a healthy relationship with it?”

For me, I’ve been borderline obsessive when it comes to setting boundaries around tech. We’ve had clear rules about where devices can be used (never in bedrooms) and how long they can be on. It hasn’t been perfect and has relaxed a little more now that they are 16 and 18, but we’ve been consistent... and consistency matters.

But no matter what structure or screen-time limit you put in place, there is one thing that matters more than anything else.

The single most protective factor for a child... in their relationship with technology and in every other part of life... is the connection they have with you.

It is this connection that keeps them from seeking belonging in unsafe places.

It is this connection that helps them feel seen, heard and understood... so they don’t turn to risky behaviours to feel recognised.

It is this connection that allows them to feel accepted and not rejected, even when the world feels harsh.

It is this connection that gives them the strength to go against the crowd, if that’s what’s right for them.

It is this connection that tells them they can turn to you when things get hard, not someone they don’t know on the internet.

We’re also learning more and more that... just as alcohol is harmful for the developing brain... so are long hours on gaming and social media. There are now digital laws being introduced to protect children, but it’s also our responsibility to put boundaries in place at home.

We wouldn’t hand over the liquor cabinet and say, “Have at it,” and yet, when it comes to devices, we can sometimes forget how powerful and potentially harmful they can be.

So much of this begins with us.

Educating ourselves, getting clear on what we feel comfortable with, and then setting and holding those boundaries with care and consistency. It’s not always easy... especially when your child says, “But all my friends have their phones in their rooms,” or “Everyone is on this app.”

But your comfort level with holding the boundary directly impacts how successful you’ll be in gaining their cooperation. They don’t have to like the limit... but your calm, grounded leadership helps them feel safe in it.

Connection won’t make things perfect. But it will create the safety and stability they need to navigate their world with more confidence and less fear.

And the beautiful thing is... it’s never too late to deepen that connection.

Have you seen Adolescence yet? What are your thoughts on it? 

Much love,
Dina

PS If this speaks to you, and you’re ready to move from tension and tech battles to true connection with your child with practical step-by-step processes and strategies, I’d love to support you. My Stressed to Best Parent Method has helped hundreds of parents create more calm, trust, and cooperation at home. Let’s talk about what that could look like for you. Book a free connection call today.